Hello and welcome to an unusual episode of Manlab! Today, things have gotten a little sawdusty around here – it is Christmas Day, after all. We’re decking the halls in our very own Grotti Grotto, and we’re determined to show you how to do Christmas the right way, without the usual festive fumbling.
Tonight’s festivities include an explosive mission to fell the Manlab Christmas tree, making Christmas crackers, and preparing a military-precision turkey dinner. We’ll even try to whip up our own snowstorm! It’s going to be magical, and maybe a bit crazy, as we bring you Christmas exactly how it should be – even though we filmed this in August.
The results of our Manlab survey showed that 60% believe Christmas needs a proper tree to feel festive. Only a few folks said turkey or games mattered as much. So, first, let’s talk trees. We’ve got a 35-foot sustainable beast. Instead of wasting energy with an axe, we’ve got explosives expert Charlie and some high-tech equipment to help us out. Think of it like a festive draft excluder that slices through trees.
Despite a bit of a hiccup, we succeeded in separating the tree from its stump with an explosive charge, all disguised cunningly as tinsel. Clean, efficient, and definitely an interesting way to start Christmas.
Next, let’s look at our tree, now magnificently set up in Manlab – and on a rotating plinth, no less. This means you get to see all sides of our fabulous tree. It’s the ultimate in tree decor!
Now, stepping into the kitchen, we plan to cook up a Christmas feast with no raw bits or disasters. Dr. Ben, Matt McIver, Razor Ruddock, and the office folks deserve a proper meal. We have our time map – called “Turkey Time” – that schedules everything down to the minute, ensuring our meal is perfect.
Keeping with our military efficiency, Oz Clark and Sergeant Major Western ensure everything runs like clockwork, with precise timing for every dish, from the turkey to the parsnips.
Meanwhile, as our dinner cooks, our guests need something to keep them entertained. Enter the Manlab exercise bike-powered music player. No pedaling, no music – a surefire way to keep everyone moving and grooving.
Speaking of entertainment, we decided to add some flair to the usual boring Christmas crackers. Imagine a roulette where one lucky cracker contains £500, while others hold less exciting – and sometimes mischievous – surprises. This should keep our guests on their toes.
To wrap things up, Oz developed a unique method to simulate the joys of drinking – The Whiskey Cloud of Peace – which allowed our guests to savor the holiday spirit through inhalation. Innovative, yes, but whether this becomes a holiday staple is anyone’s guess.
Yet, no Christmas would be complete without a white wonderland. Despite several scientific attempts to organically create snow, we resorted to a little trickery with fake snow for our grand finale. It wasn’t exactly nature’s doing, but the end result was magical.
As the music played and the fake snow fell, it became clear that Christmas in the Manlab was a roaring success, filled with creativity, a bit of madness, and above all, good cheer – all filmed in the sweltering heat of August.
Remember, the heart of Christmas goes beyond the traditions and symbols. It’s about goodwill and decency to all, not just during the holiday season but every day. Here’s to a Christmas filled with joy, laughter, and genuine human connection.
Merry Christmas to one and all!