Hey, folks! So let me fill you in on a recent adventure at the man lab where we take on the decline of modern skills with a twist of nostalgia and a ton of enthusiasm. First off, I got all riled up about a screwdriver being used as a chisel. Yeah, you heard that right. Apparently, there were over 8,000 cases last year of dudes doing this! Seriously, gents? We haven’t been advancing through art and science for the past 10,000 years just to misuse a simple hand tool like that. Let’s get our act together!
Welcome to ManLab, where we aim to revive the skills of the modern British male. Picture this like an arena where we learn, accomplish, and avoid incompetence. Last week, we built a railway transport solution, serenaded an ice maiden, gave life to a picnic table, and even diffused a World War II bomb. But this week, it was time to face a new challenge: the closure of pubs in Britain. Imagine strolling to your local pub, only to find it shut down forever! Pubs here are closing at an alarming rate of about 40 a day. We’re not about to let that slide, so we decided to create our own pub in ManLab.
Enter the ManLab bar—a shimmering beacon of stainless steel and designer wallpaper. It’s meant to be a groovy grotto where the bell never tolls. Building it required some carpentry, and we faced our fair share of mishaps. We debated how to best support our shelves (spoiler: we went with a clever dowel invention), and we experienced the anxiety of approaching a foaming ale barrel, live.
Aside from the pub, we confronted navigation without modern tools, inspired by ancient mariners. Imagine crossing the Channel without digital assistance. I set out with good old charts and a trusty dog, Dodger, who was supposed to alert me using an old alchemical method. Everything was planned meticulously, from navigating the Goodwin Sands to picking up Oz Clarke, who carried rare Chablis.
Well, the sea had other plans. We got caught in a storm, and navigational challenges went through the roof. Ultimately, safety prevailed over heroics, and we had to abandon the mission for another try next week. We’re nothing if not persistent!
Back at the lab, the bar project hit a stride. We finally got to open our very own pub with a drink raised to all the closed watering holes. It felt like an epic win, even if it did leave us looking forward to more manly endeavors.
Later, we boiled down the nuisances of minor disputes. A recurring irritant between me and our executive producer, Will, escalated into an epic duel—not with weapons but paintball guns after a health and safety intervention. Rules from the 1777 Irish Code Duello guided us, and despite swapping actual pistols for paintball due to safety concerns, it was intense.
Continuing our streak of innovation, we created a toilet bog roll alarm. It’s the worst feeling when you’re left high and dry, right? With sensors and an alarm, we prevented a colleague from an embarrassing situation, proving once again that ManLab does practical, awesome things.
Lastly, we faced the ultimate challenge of forming a man lab band from grade one lapsed musicians, prepping for a public debut at one of London’s leading classical music venues. Imagine wrangling out-of-practice musicians into harmony. There were some truly questionable moments, but in the end, it all came together.
That’s just a glimpse into the high-stakes, often hilarious activity at the ManLab. Stay tuned for more adventures as we tackle the decline of modern man skills, one project at a time!